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Kings Gameday: In Dallas. AGAIN.

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Is Texas the worst at burritos? MY COLUMN:

Back when I was traveling across the country, I had a chance to try a lot of burritos from various states. You could really get a feel for a state based off of their burrito quality I noticed. New Mexico tried hard to dress themselves up, and were well intentioned but lacked real substance. Tennessee had surprisingly solid burrito work, despite looking like nothing special. Oklahoma served just a tortilla. Arkansas didn't know what burritos were. Arizona claimed to serve burritos but didn't have any on their menus, yet tried to convince me they were a Mexican restaurant. Kentucky I couldn't get a proper read on, seeing as the burrito I had there was made by illegal immigrants from Mexico and was incredible.

Then there was Texas. I didn't get into the depths of Texas and only passed through the pan-handle, but it was still far too much of Texas. This burrito stop featured a sad, gray, little burrito. It was supposed to be a bean and cheese burrito, a staple, but it was like chewing on a tampon left out in the Mohave Desert. The servers tried to talk it up, like they were serious burrito havers. It was the standard Texas arrogance and disappointment. It was the only burrito I didn't finish on the entire trip. Fuck Texas. That is a war crime. Assholes.

Seriously, how do you make burritos bad? Fuck you.

Prediction: FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


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